By Matthew Hill
#Communication #Speakingup #diversity #culture #communication #resilience
If you creep onto the stage and treat the whole adventure like going in front of a firing squad, then you will get a similar result.
When you are giving off a worried, stressed or nervous vibe, this will be picked up by the introverts in the audience (about 70% of them in the UK!) and their viewing habits will change from getting ready to gratefully receive your pearls of wisdom, to becoming your concerned parents. They will be fretting over whether you are going to fall from the stage, if you know how to use the audio visual equipment, and whether you are going to break down and cry before you have finished speaking. Non of this is called engagement.
If you are not giving the impression of being in control, the audience will step in and do it for you, using their telepathic parenting powers.
Cost
This will impact your credibility, brand and reputation. They will unconsciously and consciously move into rescue mode and relegate you to being, in their minds, not competent, nervous and as someone struggling to perform.
This will in turn undermines any attempt you make to impress them with your experience, depth of knowledge or daring insights and wisdom. You will appear inconsistent or even a fantasist – “How could this nervous flower have possibly won in a negotiation with Titan of industry X? That story must be made up.”
Fake it or Find it
Now reverse the flow. You come on to the stage with inner confidence. The audience have zero doubts. They lean in and listen intently. They buy you and what you are selling. Remember, people are secretly begging to be lead, told and given the answers. They sit there in raptures, absorbing your message, being impressed by your style, and you feeling like you were always meant to end up briefing the stars on what is good for them.
How do we get you from heart thumping self-doubter to owning your body, nerves and voice, controlling the airspace around you and bossing the and stage and the room?
Nervous or excited?
We choose to relabel our physiological excesses – thumping heart, red face, sweaty palms, shallow breathing, and pulsating sphincter as…EXCITEMENT. This is what opera singers do – And they have a much tougher job than you. They have to remember hours of music and lyrics, sing in a second or third language, wear heavy clothes and still move around the stage, interact with props whilst singing, sing in tune and keep time with the conductor and the orchestra. Wow. That is 5 times more than you are being asked to do.
When you label the betrayals of your body as encouragement, enthusiasm and expectation, everything shifts. You can take this corporal resistance as assistance. You can then see all of this as the accelerator not the brake.
And…
Add a sentence
Add a sentence when you are out and about. Engage with more people, become an adapted introvert and increase your zone of control out in the wild. When you have interacted with 20 people with that extra piece of communication, you will feel differently about a random audience and your mind will become less protective, and more adventurous.
And
Top tips
Get to the venue early, speak to the AV guy and have him help you set up and test the mic and let you walk out on the stage. Imagine friendly faces in the audience and run through your slides if you are using any. Do your vocal warm up on the stage. Walk around and inhabit the space. Fill out the role that you have been given.
And
Practice your power first line and your power last line – That is what most people will react to.
And…
You may not sleep the night before. We overcome this by ensuring a decent rest, TWO nights before the show. This will reassure you when, on the eve of the battle, your mind is racing. “At least I managed to get some decent rest last night.” This will often be enough to…get you to sleep. Do lay off the coffee, booze or excesses of sugar and heavy food. Doing these things will give you the greatest chance of doing your best and making a positive impact with your audience.
Finally
Know that when you have performed well once, you can revisit that, now anchored success state, and find your past peace and power that you can access and now use in the future.
About the Author
Matthew Hill is a Presentation Skills Trainer, Coach and Facilitator, helping locked inside talent escape from regular corporate executives so that you can realise your full full full career potential. Happy to talk…
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